That admiration has now shifted to Jenny Sanford. Her commitment to her personal ideals began in their early dating relationship when she realized that while that she wanted "a steady, solid love" similar to that experienced by her parents and grandparents. One of the most touching passages of the book is her description of this love she desired...
"I hadn't yet found the man who had inspired that kind of devotion, the kind of man worthy of the kind of love I knew I was capable of giving. Honestly, I hadn't been looking too hard. Although I hadn't experienced it yet myself, I expected that the platitudes about true love were absolutely true. I imagined that it would involve understanding, patience, sacrifice, selflessness, and commitment. If I was going to commit, I would give it my all. I wanted to pledge loyalty to another person, to a set of values, goals, and dreams, and to a family. I realize to some that this might seem the opposite of romantic. But I saw from watching and talking to my parents that passions and romance come and go through the seasons of life; what sustains you are shared values and common goals. I found that incredibly romantic."
While long, I find this quote to be important because it encapsulates Jenny's entire approach (at least as reported) to their marital successes and ultimate trials. Her desire for reconciliation and then choosing to forgive, despite the growing list of indiscretions, illustrate a depth of love and loyalty that showed an unworthiness on the part of her husband.
This is what makes this a meaningful memoir and not simply a scandal-driven story. Instead of leaving the reader with the feelings of frustration and irritation at this man who had so little concern for his wife and family, Jenny Sanford leaves us with a lesson on what true forgiveness is all about. "Saying 'I forgive you' is not the same as saying 'what you have done is okay.' ... Forgiveness really is a gift for each of us. It gave [gives] us the freedom to move forward happily, free from our unfortunate situation."
While I would hope and pray that I would never find myself in the same situation as Jenny Sanford, I would like to think I would handle any difficult circumstance in which I found myself with the same degree of faith, grace, and unswerving devotion to those things which truly matter.
